Danielle GaudetteDanielle GaudetteDanielle GaudetteDanielle Gaudette
A redemptive story of family, forgiveness, and the journey to self-acceptance.
The Healing Tree by Danielle Gaudette
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A-Parents

Published on May 15, 2022  |  0 

I have to admit, although I am an adoptee myself, I have not been hip to the adoption-world. As I seek to share Healing Tree, I have become a little more familiar with the adoption community and have been exposed to this notion of the “constellation,” or “triad.” For those who are not familiar, this triad is made up of the adoptee, the birth parents (b-parents) and the adoptive parents (a-parents).

I was not aware of any of this growing up.  I knew I was adopted, but I did not consider my parents to be a-parents — they were just my parents, and I adored them.  These days, the more I read, the more I hear, the more I learn, the more I feel incredibly blessed for the amount of genuine, selfless love they showered upon me.  Some days, I feel like I want to stand in a room full of adoptive parents with a megaphone and announce: Please just love your children as if they were your own!  That’s all they need!  They need your huge, warm affectionate, unconditional love and trust, and that will be the best medicine for their wounded little hearts!  That will be the ointment to soothe the sting of their rejection and abandonment issues that lurk within! Love, love, love! It’s the greatest possible gift!

That is what my parents gave to me.  Therefore, I’d like to declare them as my A+ parents 🙂 I am 100% certain that, given the chaotic nature of my complicated mind, I could have suffered a much worse fate, had it not been for their enormous, unwavering love. It was a love I never doubted. 

So, today’s post is a shout out for my A+ parents! As I have already shared, my mother passed away in 2013.  But my  father is still out there in Watertown, MA., and he may even be reading this right now.  He just recently told me how he’s been continuing to order Healing Tree from Amazon to keep the sales up, how he shared it with his friends at tennis, and he even sent me a little text of a positive response from someone who had read it, per his suggestion.  He’s still being as A+ as ever.  He has always supported me, always encouraged me and has never judged me or my choices.  Words cannot describe my gratitude. In all honesty, sometimes when I think of his goodness, I just feel speechless.

For those who may have read the “I was Adopted” chapter of Healing Tree, I wanted to share a few photos I had intended to add to it – pictures, I feel, that say everything there is to say about my beloved A+ Parents.

me and dad floor

This is one of my personal favorites. I have many happy memories with my dad on the living room floor: Listening to his records for hours – Air Supply, Fleetwood Mac, REO Speed Wagon and Pink Floyd, to name a few.  And when we weren’t singing and dancing we were clearly having many important talks 🙂

pool pic e1652676879578

My mom was a sun-bum. She LOVED the beach, and second to it was lying out in the backyard by the pool.  I was less interested than she, but so happy anytime I got to be be in her arms. Her hugs were the best. And her love always made me feel safe. 

me dad mom doll e1652676947728

I couldn’t resist including this one because I just love their bright smiles and the love I can almost see emanating from their faces. They always made me feel special.

“My parents were simple, wholesome people. My mother showed me how to love and be loved.  My father showed me how to be stable, loyal, and how to keep a pure heart – to feed the ducks, squirrels and stray cats of the world, to take pictures of beautiful flowers and butterflies, and to always look up and appreciate the moon.” – Healing Tree

Thank you for everything, my beautiful A-parents ~

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